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ParentsUncut Pod
This is a Podcast surrounding the adventure, struggle, beauty and intricacies of new parenthood. Hosted by three parents, totally 10 kids in together, they go through their mazes and phases of parenting styles, parenting norms, modern day parents, their trials and tribulations whilst keeping it raw and unfiltered. Thanking you for joining us on this journey and we hope we can bring some value to new parents, old parents and those thinking of becoming parents
ParentsUncut Pod
Aged by Experience from the Brink of Death to Parental Bedtime Battles | Episode 11 pt 2
Get ready for an emotional rollercoaster as we dive deep into the profound journey of aging and the incredible power of second chances. In this episode, we share personal stories of survival, from street violence to life-threatening medical conditions, and the transformative impact these experiences had on our lives. Join us as we explore the unexpected encounters, the moments of self-realization, and the ultimate triumph of forgiveness and healing. It's a raw and honest conversation that will leave you with a renewed sense of gratitude for every heartbeat.
As we reflect on the privilege of growing older, we celebrate reaching milestone ages like 40 and the wisdom that comes with it. But our conversation takes a serious turn as we recount a near-death experience and the subsequent battle with depression that followed. We share the journey from darkness to light, highlighting the importance of life's trials in shaping gratitude and the power of healing and forgiveness. Plus, listen in as we discuss the transformative power of surviving heart attacks and medical procedures, and how facing mortality can shift one's perspective on life.
Parenting challenges also take center stage in this episode, as we exchange tales of late nights, Lego minefields, and those moments that truly test a parent's patience. We delve into the unexpected humor that comes with the chaos of raising children and share personal anecdotes that will have you nodding along in solidarity. And brace yourself for a lively debate on the cultural nuances of language in our homes as we discuss the great cursing debate. Should we swear in front of our kids? Tune in to hear our thoughts and join the conversation.
Thank you for being here, thank you for your time and energy. We hope that we can ALL build this incredible community for parents by parents with parents.
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This soda.
Speaker 2:Yeah, this is actually culture pop. We ain't even pop yet.
Speaker 3:Today, we, oh, we should, yeah, we should.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Johnny's 40,. Michelle's birthday. Icy's crew.
Speaker 2:I'm happy to be alive, right Like not for nothing. We know Like we lose people all day, every day. So when I see like there's people in my circle, right Cause we all were born in 84. And they were just like complaining in January, like damn bro, I'm 40.
Speaker 3:He's talking about me. Those are people, you could just say me.
Speaker 2:It's not like yo, not for nothing, man, Would you rather not? And no, I wouldn't Like. I want to get as old as possible where I can actually still have memories, still be functional and shit like that. So all this shit to me is always like dope. I'm happy to be alive, I'm grateful I wouldn't be here. They almost took me off this planet August 5th 2004,. They tried to send me to the Lord. They jumped me, man, I was mild brain damage, short-term coma, Looking like, I'll tell you, like quasi-modal. They just thought my face out.
Speaker 1:Wait where, ooh what?
Speaker 2:I was a little reckless back then.
Speaker 1:It was in the club or something, no, in the hood.
Speaker 2:And I went looking for trouble. But it found me and they jumped me Right. So then afterwards that's when the whole God's favor this shit started happening. I remember I was in the hospital and I woken up and I was feeling like shit. I remember I'd go to the bathroom almost 20 times and I saw my face in the mirror and I couldn't feel it because obviously I was like on mad shit. I'm like yo. I started laughing hysterically because I'm barely seen through like this little space that my fucking eyes could see, and my shit is like this. I got an even bigger forehead like my head, and had long hair at that time. I look crazy. And then I just started crying, but like, not even bad, not like I'm about to start crying.
Speaker 1:It's like an imagine, like that.
Speaker 2:It was a grateful cry. It was like holy, exactly like yo, I'm God's favorite. Like holy shit. I started going hard with that stuff. Then I felt like crazy depression. I spent three years with me and a maniac looking for the people that jumped me.
Speaker 1:Did you ever find them?
Speaker 2:I did one night without knowing. That's why God saved them. I was with my cousin Josh. He was like 430 in the morning. We were home for some more, so we weren't looking for people at that time and we're just driving and shit. And we were in. He lived in East Elmhurst at that time.
Speaker 2:So we were in Astoria Boulevard and some kid is like crossing the street, but mad slow, and I'm like driving up, there's like a fork that leads this is Astoria Boulevard and this is that side street and goes like this and he's just going mad slow and I'm like, look at this asshole bro, Like if I were not paying attention I could have ran him over. So then when he's passing the car, I beeped the horn. I say yo, you don't care about your life. And I keep driving and he looks and I see his face go like that Light up and I was like Josh, that's such and such. He's like what? Yo, right there in my mind just went brrrring.
Speaker 2:I speed on Astoria Boulevard. I see him like running across Astoria Boulevard. I'm like, oh, I'm about to run this kid over. It's a wrap. Boom, boom, boom. I do a? U turn up this like hill that he went up, went there, Look everywhere, couldn't find him. Had I seen or known that that was him at that moment, just off of stupidity, right Like that ego, I would have just ran over him like, oh here we go, yeah, Back bitch. And it was.
Speaker 3:Now you'll be locked up for life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and now I'm actually. I became grateful for that moment, like my ex, the one that was with that time. She told me one day she's like yo, I saw. So what happened is my boy, cookie, went and stabbed one of the guys the next day while I was in the hospital. Oh right, like kind of like you know revenge, sending a message, yeah. And then that same guy saw my ex, probably like seven years later right Cause I was 20, so I'd be 27 times yeah. And she said, yo, I saw such and such and he's just wanted to apologize. He's like yo, we were young, doing dumb shit. I know you're making that face, but Apologize after he almost killed you.
Speaker 3:Yeah, at that moment.
Speaker 2:It'll be, good forever.
Speaker 2:We good, I mean say something about me. I was just like yo. I want to thank him because that shit shifted my brain, that shifted my outlook on life. I stopped doing dumb shit Now, not like I was in the streets all day, heavy, I'm not doing all crazy, but I was, I guess, absent of meaning. You know what I mean. Like I didn't really like take shit serious at that time. I was like let's do dumb shit. That shit totally shifted me, send me on a totally different path and now I'm here, and here we are, yeah.
Speaker 2:Hotting it up Right Almost, died three times.
Speaker 1:Same, no you see yes.
Speaker 2:So we're here for a reason.
Speaker 1:Yeah, three times, wow, four times the charm. Oh, fuck, no.
Speaker 4:I'm kidding. No, yeah, no.
Speaker 1:I'm like no.
Speaker 2:You survive three times, you're good.
Speaker 1:So it's funny because after like what happened to me, I was at a card reader and she said you know, I'm I'm traumatized from almost losing my life three times. So what happened? So I suffered three scad induced heart attacks.
Speaker 2:What the fuzzles knocks.
Speaker 1:Wow. So scad is something called spontaneous coronary artery dissection and it's basically a tear in the artery, in the wall of your arteries. That tear creates a flap. That flap creates a blockage. So most people have heart attacks because they're unhealthy. They have, like clogged arteries. That wasn't the case with me. I just had a flap that way. You were born with this.
Speaker 2:No, oh, they can't explain it, like they don't know.
Speaker 1:There's so little research that it's hard to explain anything. They didn't even know what was going on with me.
Speaker 3:How did you know you were having a heart attack?
Speaker 1:I felt like this. It felt like an elephant stepping on my chest.
Speaker 4:Well, like you couldn't breathe Pressure.
Speaker 1:I could breathe, but it was just like you know, when you get like indigestion and that shit is like ooh, like what's that. But it didn't go away. So I remember I was getting ready for work, it was food and wine weekend. I was mad hype, three day event. My husband was coming home from LA and I'm making the kids breakfast and I'm like, oh, these things excitement. I was like you know what the fuck is that I sit down. I'm like something's not right.
Speaker 1:So I called for my son, my oldest son, same thing. I was like, can you get me my asthma pump? Because immediately I went to what happened after surgery? Nothing. So he calls my father-in-law. My father-in-law is like an encyclopedia and he's like, listen, it's, you know, it's the chest. Just call 911. Again, I didn't want to get the bill. So I was like, don't worry, like I'll drive, I'll take you guys to school and then I'll drive to the hospital, which I had no intention of doing. And so he called and ambulance came and they didn't know what was happening. Get to the hospital. I got a burp.
Speaker 1:That's how you noticed this shit got me mad burpee.
Speaker 3:Oh.
Speaker 2:Shit.
Speaker 1:No, but when I got to the hospital they didn't even know what was going on. They're like oh cuz, you look fine, right, like I don't look like I didn't pass out none of that. I kind of look like just like this, but in that's the only symptom you have discomfort, yeah. So, um, they're like we're gonna have to keep you and I was like no, I was devastated. They did like blood work. They were like look, your troponin levels are really high. That's an indication that your heart is in like under distress. Like we need to figure out why that was on a Friday. I didn't find out until Saturday. They were like oh, you know, you had an end stemmy. We're gonna transfer you to white planes hospital because they didn't have a cath lab. So I had to be transferred to white planes to have a catheterization done. Do you know?
Speaker 2:what that is. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Catherine no no, no, no, no. It's kind of when they go into your heart, through your vein, or the artery with like a little camera.
Speaker 2:Maybe that's what Catherine comes from there, yeah because it goes through All right.
Speaker 1:So they did that. They did that on a Monday. By Wednesday I was discharged. Go home. I was cleared to work by Friday. So Friday I'm getting ready to go to work, kind of excited to get out of the house, and then all of a sudden again, yeah, I'm like now I don't know if I'm bugging out right, because Anything is triggering me. I'm like shit, like am I bugging out? Am?
Speaker 1:I feeling something is it in my head? And then Mike was like yo, I'm calling, like I'm not even gonna risk it. So he called my cardiologist. My cardiologist was like take her straight to white planes, don't even bring her to the nearest hospital, get there. And this one was different. So there's stemmy and then there's end stemmy. I can't really break down what the difference is, but it's it's different. And With this one they were like like you know, I look normal. So they just kind of sat me down and then when they hooked up the machines they were like take off your clothes, they pulled somebody out of the room and they were like we have to take you back to have another calf done. In that calf they punctured me. They internally puncture me, but again, it's internal, so you don't know right. So it was different because they went in through my groin so they couldn't go in through the same side. They went in through the other side. When they went in your foot, you're not fully out, you're like partially awake. I Would pass the fuck out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, my man, I felt like I was on a hammock. That's how like intense. Well, you said they did, yeah, but I could hear everything that was going on.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and literally I felt like I was like this like just on a hammock. But when they went in I felt like lightning go through my body and I didn't know what it was. And then at the end of the procedure there was a nurse for like 20 minutes just applying pressure. You know, take me up to ICU. I'm there with Mike. I'm like what are we gonna order?
Speaker 3:I'm hungry and then, all of a sudden, I'm like did you realize at that moment that you had a heart attack?
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, well, they already knew they already knew because they went in and they were like it's the same, it's the same tear. I didn't know I was punctured though. So then, all of a sudden, I'm like yo, I can't breathe, like I feel like I can breathe, and when you're in ICU, you have two nurses. So one nurse is like she's like, you're fine, I'm gonna give you a little oxygen for Comfort, but you're fine. And then, all of a sudden, those machines start. They push Mike out the way. I got one nurse here, I got one. Yeah, that shit was intense. I like, yeah and um, Did you like?
Speaker 3:were you like coding?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know, mike was there like for the whole thing, and I just remember the nurse to my right Saying to me she was like just stay with me, like just just just stay with me. And it was to the point like I could hear her fading, like I couldn't even talk anymore Because I kept saying something's wrong, something's wrong, something's wrong, something's wrong. And I'm looking at her and I could see the fear in her eye and when they kicked him out, you know, they like like opened up all my, my, my, dressing. Then I have all these doctors around me and this one is connecting me to, like blood transfusion and she you know the one on this side, she's like just stay with me. And then, all of a sudden, once I started to regain life, I have three nurses, three doctors rather, and they're arguing about what happened. The guy who did the procedure, the catheterization, because they realized that you had a function, yeah, so he literally said her organs are distorted because she had a tummy tuck.
Speaker 4:What Shut the fuck up yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he literally said that yeah, she was crazy. Wow, yeah, so that was that. That's a miracle, yeah. And then the third one was not too long ago. I had gotten a really good call. I was excited and then all of a sudden, an hour later, I'm like this was different. I had like a ball in my throat and I'm like what the fuck is that Like? Can I swallow? I feel like I can't swallow. Oh, thank you so much.
Speaker 2:Give you some bounty so you could rip the skin.
Speaker 1:But yeah, the third one again think I'm like was home, because I'm the type, like whenever I think something's wrong, I'm like I'm going to go to sleep. Yeah, crazy, Right, like I'm going to just go to sleep so this could like pass, and thank God, you know, I ended up going upstairs to my room Now I have like this blood pressure machine and I'm always checking my blood pressure and my shit was through the roof. It was like 126, 176 over 126. It was yeah, whoa, it was up there, and so he called 911. And they came, and he called 911 and all the things and they were like, yeah, we're going to have to do another catheterization. Is that the right word?
Speaker 3:Catheterization Could be, yeah, well, that's, yeah, that's any, any procedure. I believe that's going to A vein, yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, good Cause, now you got me thinking it's no cause that's what my mom.
Speaker 4:It's different. Yeah, no, no, no, it is that.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, I'm sure when they do that, that's still a catheter going into the vein.
Speaker 4:Yeah. Yeah, something to transport, yeah, that's because my my dad had a double bypass. Then he yeah. So he had a catheterization doing that. They did a stent, all of the things.
Speaker 3:Yeah, everything is true, all the things.
Speaker 2:You should get an Apple watch. I do. I have one, that should. That saved lives. I know that it picks up on some shit I don't know what it is but Do they say that you would have to get like a defibrillator or a?
Speaker 4:pacemaker. It says your heart rate.
Speaker 1:No, I had a burp again, girl.
Speaker 2:She has a heart condition, so she's allowed to. Sorry, sorry.
Speaker 1:Sorry, it's this, guys, I promise, yeah, don't drink this, I'm not a piggy.
Speaker 2:Hopefully you do.
Speaker 1:No, but yeah. But getting back to the reader, she has said to me she was. It was a Dominican woman. Shout out Maggie, she's the bomb. She was like si no te querían ahí arriba o ahí abajo, like you're not going anywhere anytime soon. You're going to live a long life, amen.
Speaker 2:Nice.
Speaker 1:Word Amen so yeah, did.
Speaker 2:Is that fixed or is that something that you got to live with? That's something I got to live with. So what are, like, what are steps you're supposed to take? Percussions, yeah, like.
Speaker 1:So now they just going to jack me up on, like all this medication, because after the second one, I was on all these medications and when I went to see my primary which I don't know why I waited so long to see him but he was like yo, why they got you on all these meds Like this is. This is the prescription recipe for someone who's had a traditional heart attack. You did not, so they, they slowly weaned me off of everything and now I'm back on everything.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Which is, and you have to follow up regularly with the cardiologists. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's like so what do you do? Like I can't get too excited, I can't be stressed out, like what do you do? How do you maintain?
Speaker 4:like Like how do you like Especially?
Speaker 3:as a parent especially here.
Speaker 4:Right, you're a parent, you have a job that I'm sure is stressful. Yeah, you know, you're in New York City.
Speaker 2:You like to drink?
Speaker 1:Yeah, hello, I do. I work for a liquor company, that's what.
Speaker 3:I'm saying yeah, so it's like I mean, can you still drink? Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's not too many things like I can't do, which is, you know, crazy, because there's no way to like prevent it.
Speaker 2:Because there's really nothing outside of maybe, like you said, emotional triggers like going too high or too low it really affects it. It's not like, oh, because if you stop eating this, you'll be all right.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, no, so the the walls in my arteries are very weak, so I guess stress is causing them to like act up Little bitch ass.
Speaker 2:Bitch ass aorta.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, but I'm super grateful to be alive and you know, that's. That's a lot, yeah, it really is a testimony. So, just to go full circle, I'm afraid to have like any kind of reconstructive surgery. Because of that. I'm like no, I get it. Yeah, Like the trauma.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Scared if it happens again. Yeah. You know, like honestly, I talk a lot of shit saying I would, I probably would get like lipopo, but not like any, like major surgery, like that.
Speaker 1:Well, the tummy tuck is the worst surgery you could have yeah, Get out of here. I mean yeah, Because it's never it's, it's the biggest like cut that they can make on your body.
Speaker 3:Listen, I have the video. I still have all of that Like. I will gladly share so you guys can see. Well, that's.
Speaker 2:Patreon content.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, you can show me, say that you want to see my whole you. Hey yo 1196.
Speaker 4:1196.
Speaker 3:Just $10 a day. $10 a day for that shit, yeah, hello, well, thank you for being here.
Speaker 2:Thank you for having me All of you.
Speaker 4:When you come back?
Speaker 3:No, let me know when. Listen, we could use the extra person. A gang up on Johnny's the Boricuas in the house. No, I appreciate you sharing your story with us and I'm sure you're going to be an inspiration to other women out there Hopefully, yeah.
Speaker 2:Hopefully you all listen, because that's a woman thing.
Speaker 4:Oh, that just happened to her, not me. I mean yeah.
Speaker 3:You know, there may be that, just that one, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you right Again. Nothing wrong with this, you got to do your research.
Speaker 4:Let's go past the surgery and all of that trauma, like things that you've gone through with your condition, with your heart.
Speaker 1:That's just right, skad, it's so rare.
Speaker 4:People probably are like you know what is this? Or you could warning signs that women out there or men out there. I don't know if this is you know.
Speaker 1:So it mostly targets young, healthy women under the age of like 50.
Speaker 4:That is crazy. Big ass demographic. That is a big right, or?
Speaker 1:like a back pain or neck pain, like because there's so many different.
Speaker 2:Or be a Pisces and say I'm just going to take a nap, I'll sleep this way I'll sleep this one away.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I got this all the time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, yeah, I'm just being a little bitch, bro. It's a little pain, you good. Come on Not thinking like any little sign could be something else. But yeah, we'll save that for the Patreon. So again, thank you for being here.
Speaker 1:Thank you for having me, you guys, yeah, think.
Speaker 2:What is that cutting shit?
Speaker 3:I mean, we should. You know, Amir, Babe, I love you.
Speaker 1:My hero so the whole.
Speaker 3:Love is blind. Part Love is blind.
Speaker 2:OK.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yes, throwback.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he doesn't. He doesn't like any of that shit yeah.
Speaker 3:No, no, no. It makes no, no, no no, no, it's entertaining.
Speaker 4:You do your job very well. Listen, do what you want. I don't give a shit. I'm just here to talk.
Speaker 1:Yo this shami mad burp.
Speaker 3:I can't yeah, it has like.
Speaker 4:Yo, you got fucking mad bloopers. You know how many you get. How many times did it? No, that was funny.
Speaker 2:In the middle of a serious. That's what I'm like. I got a burp and I'm like, Dan, that's what happens. It heart attacks. Where is this shit going?
Speaker 4:That really happened. That's what you said.
Speaker 1:No, because I felt that shit. I'm like oh my God, I should have never drank this.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of it? No, I didn't I didn't, yes, I just felt like I needed this needed some Tito. Thank you for sure People.
Speaker 4:That would have been good with it, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 4:Thank you.
Speaker 1:Well see.
Speaker 3:So you want to do the ask the parents what do you want to do?
Speaker 2:Oh shit, that's our new segment.
Speaker 3:Hello, you got to rest your back yeah.
Speaker 2:So we do it all. I guess there's a new segment.
Speaker 4:It's not a new segment anymore, it's just a segment. Hi have we used it in any clips, I think with Mike's Mike because he asked you guys about the school. Thing.
Speaker 2:Yes, oh yes, that was where you abuse your kids. You're like do you abuse your kid? Listen to say it on camera Listen, you know what's funny. No, that's not funny. Abusing kids is not funny.
Speaker 3:Fox was a big part of the school Fox was a big part of the school Fox was a big part of the school Fox was a big part of the school yeah, yeah, yeah, cut that out. What did you say? Cut what out you? I said he was a nice man. Nice man For fuck.
Speaker 4:I thought your facial expression. You act like I don't know, you bitch.
Speaker 3:What am I thinking right now?
Speaker 4:I can't say it on camera. That's my bestie. I can't say it, it's incriminating.
Speaker 2:So we have a segment called Ask the Parents. Are there any questions before the show is over that you would like to ask us?
Speaker 1:Ask the parents.
Speaker 4:Ask us anything, anything that we spoke about.
Speaker 1:Do you guys curse in front of your kids? Yep. All the time, so you don't try to not curse in front of them. Nope, I don't want this.
Speaker 3:But when they curse, I'm like you. Better not fucking curse.
Speaker 2:I think, yeah, but I think that's kind of the approach that I've had, because I started that kind of like I quote on to my nieces and nephews, jeremy and Arby, like I was in their life since when I was 14, the other ones born all the time, and their mother, my sister, myself, my brother, my mom, we just fucking cuss all day long. My mother's favorite word. My mother, samuel Jackson. Everything is motherfucker.
Speaker 3:Your mother.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Hello, I love her.
Speaker 2:Like that motherfucker. She had like a raspy voice.
Speaker 3:I'm surprised she didn't curse in Dominican you know, nah, that's her favorite word.
Speaker 2:So the kids grew up around us.
Speaker 3:Cursing Dominican. You know the Dominican cursing. That's not Spanish. Well, you know it's different.
Speaker 2:Dominican and Puerto Rican. Cursing you guys use beecho Like punieta, like little kids. That's beecho. What do we say?
Speaker 1:Yo me cago en la madre Que te pario. Wow, that's so rude.
Speaker 3:Ija de la gran puta.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's a good one, Damn.
Speaker 2:I'll be like damn, is my mom a hoe?
Speaker 4:No, my mom's a hoe. It's so funny because I'll be like I'm your son, that's your mom's mom.
Speaker 3:That's such a good girl. Well, you know, my mom probably was back in the day, who knows?
Speaker 2:Nah, but I do it with like not do it on purpose, like yo watch me curse in front of my kids, but I still do it to this day. And even Pinupi Pinupi's eight and she don't walk around cursing. And I told her that if you watch something like, oh that shit is crazy, I don't mind, I really don't. Don't curse at people, like I don't want you to tell somebody yo fuck you or any of that stuff. That's a no go yeah that's different, right, but they haven't.
Speaker 2:But eventually, like with my nephew, he wouldn't curse at all. Then, all of a sudden, when he was like 13 and he's on the games, all you hear from the room is oh you fucking bitch ass, motherfucker. And I'm like what the fuck? That's not, jeremy, yeah. And I'm like yo, what are you doing, bro?
Speaker 4:You know everybody can hear you. Yeah. So with Ruben he was like I don't know, maybe like 10 or 11. And I was, like you know, he started cursing and I was. I was like listen, you don't do it in school, you don't curse at anybody, you don't do it in front of your grandmother, because she's going to kill me, like you know, you got to do it Like if you're at home, if a shit or a fuck or whatever slips, it is what it is, it's fine, yeah. And now he just throws f bombs, like that's what it is. And then oh, now he's 20.
Speaker 1:Oh, oh, oh.
Speaker 4:Forget it. And then Devin I never really had that talk with him because he kind of like was the same. He's the incurs now. He's like he be on the game and he's like your mother's a bitch.
Speaker 2:That's what it is, oh fuck you and I'm like whoa, whoa, Not cause you be on there trying to play nice, and then all these people are ruthless, Like Fox said that last week, where he's like yo these kids with no fucking manners and he's just flipping out talking shit. And adults, adults be out there cursing out little kids Like you, fucking loser, your mother's dissing that. I'm like yo, bro.
Speaker 4:Yo, one time it was funny cause he was on the game one time and he was playing somebody online. It was someone older and he was. They were shit talking each other, right, and I'm like, bro, why are you shit talking? An older man and he's like so he was Devin is the best shit talker ever. Like he is. He will make you feel so sorry your life Damn.
Speaker 3:He really sounds like his mother. He's a billet, or yes?
Speaker 4:And the guy I heard him. He's like. He's like where's your mother? He's like like telling him like yo, you should be in bed, where's your mother? He goes, my mom is right behind me laughing at you.
Speaker 1:I love that yeah.
Speaker 3:You see, romeo, I know he's a fucking badass. Yo Romeo, he's my problem child.
Speaker 4:He tried to get my four year old. He's my middle child.
Speaker 3:He's the only boy, so he knows how to test me Be cursing on the game. And I'm like stop fucking cursing. And you know, now he's behaving because of the bell, cause I'd be his ass with the bell. And then the other day he disappeared after school. He was supposed to tell me he was going to the park. He didn't stop. So I'm calling his phone and he's not picking up. So I tracked his location. I'm following it. I go around the park. I don't see him.
Speaker 3:I pull up my Starbucks and he calls me like oh, I was like you didn't ask me if you could go to park. He was like I told you I wanted to go. I was like telling me and asking me is a different thing. He's supposed to call me after school. So then he gets in the car and his friends and vex and he's all like looking all nervous. I was like what's the matter? And he's like. He was like you know, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. And I'm like you think I'm gonna hit you. He goes, yeah, he's like are you? And I was like no, I'm not going to hit you. But he was scared.
Speaker 1:Good, you got to put the fear guy.
Speaker 3:Yeah, listen, I did, cause I was and I and I said I don't hit my kids, but I had to like go back on that, be a hypocrite. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And basically, well, not my kids, cause Katie's my little angel.
Speaker 2:It's not a hypocrite, it's just the situation called for it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I didn't get hit. I was good, I was the favorite child. I'm still the favorite. I only got hit like twice, once by my father. Did you see that story where my father like slammed the table on my head cause I told him to shut up?
Speaker 4:Yeah, I know you kind of got to be like yeah, the table was like, yeah, he did a wrestling.
Speaker 3:move on. Me Bucketing broke the table on my I don't mean to laugh. But I reflected my father and I never cursed in front of him again.
Speaker 4:Damn.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I got slapped by my mom once. She'll probably see this and be like you're such a liar. You smacked me once. I remember I was screaming out the window and she was like look at the.
Speaker 3:And I was like and she was like were you dramatic when you got smacked? Like no, I was in shock.
Speaker 1:I was like, did this bitch just smack me, damn?
Speaker 4:She didn't mean that she didn't call you. I didn't.
Speaker 1:I didn't, I didn't, oh, no, it wasn't at her. No, no, no, no. It was in my head. I was like, yeah, Yo she.
Speaker 2:She really, as long as you're not saying it to me, right.
Speaker 4:Whoa Love your life, right, right, we have some questions.
Speaker 3:Questions from the fans. Whoa Okay, fan question number one.
Speaker 4:Fan question number one, random Um. Would you rather deal with your child having lice or your child having the stomach flu, stomach flu?
Speaker 3:Stomach flu Hell yeah. I dealt with lice before. Yeah, when the kids came back from camping, my sister took them camping. Harmony had lice. I was pregnant with Romeo. It was the worst thing. I swear I, if it was up to me, I would have shaved her head off. I would have shaved her hair off.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:We had be a host. It was horrible. I was paranoid. I put the lice thing on my hair because I'm like they're going to go on my hair. I have lice too. It was terrible. Yeah, how about you, johnny?
Speaker 2:No. I'm taking a stomach flu. Yeah, that light shade. There's too many chemicals. You got to start dealing with Too much of a long process. You actually have to be a parent at that moment, so I'd rather just be like whoa. That's a medicine, it's a medicine.
Speaker 3:Ginger ale.
Speaker 4:I feel like it's different when you have, when you have boys and when you have girls. The girls have long. Well, that's the total guy. The boys have the short, shorter hair, so it's easier to deal with.
Speaker 2:The girls have the longer hair Magic harmony, you have to.
Speaker 4:No, I had to do it with. With Ami we used to go. He was in school, young, he was like five and six, and they were like come pick up your kid Him and another girl. It's terrible. Yeah, they had, they both had it have you ever had it. I had it when I remember having a third grade.
Speaker 3:I remember the day I had it. I was in an auditorium and there was a little girl next to me. It's a little dirty girl. She was scratching and I felt something jump on my head and I had to be a host, Like my mom. I remember my mom was pissed off.
Speaker 1:She was better than me.
Speaker 3:I'm like it's not my fault, oh fuck.
Speaker 1:Typical Puerto Rican mom.
Speaker 2:Let's keep the the would you rather flow?
Speaker 4:Oh.
Speaker 2:Would you rather step on a Lego and I just step on it like walking. But like you just jumped up and excitement, all of a sudden your foot just went or be headbutted by a big headed toddler.
Speaker 4:I've had both. I've had fucking both, not at the same time. Different occasions I had a freaking black eye by one of my children headbutted me right here in my freaking cheekbone, and I have definitely stepped on Ruben's Legos and so angry I put them all together and threw them in the fucking garbage. Because why are they all over the floor? That shit is like getting shot. Yo, I've never been shot, so I don't know that that's true. That shit hurts.
Speaker 2:I've been shot. It's nothing like it.
Speaker 3:You got shot.
Speaker 2:Nah, come on, man, it's a story line.
Speaker 1:Just told you I don't get the streets Lego, yeah, because I may like just swing on a toddler, if he but 100%.
Speaker 4:I was in shock.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was like, yeah, my kid is nine months, and whenever she just goes, don't like I just hit it right back.
Speaker 1:Your math foul. It builds character, right, she's going with that. No, she's got your head.
Speaker 4:She's got your forehead.
Speaker 2:She's good man.
Speaker 3:Yo, no Legos. I hate them. That's why I need little toys, especially when you're mad and you step on it, I'm doing everything out. That's bad.
Speaker 2:Even if you're not mad, that shit makes you angry.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's like stubbing your. You know when you're mad and you get caught in the door. Handle, oh my.
Speaker 1:God, that's literally what I'm thinking right now. Right, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:The one, this one here. Would you rather clean a diaper blowout at 35,000 feet or have your child vomit in the car on the freeway?
Speaker 4:No, Number two.
Speaker 3:Yeah, what was the one with that with the vomiting?
Speaker 2:Diaper blowing that little ass bathroom.
Speaker 3:Oh no.
Speaker 4:That's yeah, I'm good.
Speaker 1:I'll deal with the vomit 100%. Yeah, no, yeah, cause then I'm throwing up with you and now we both throwing up with this Double throw up to clean.
Speaker 4:That's exactly why I wore it Diaper blowout all day.
Speaker 3:I'll do the vomit.
Speaker 2:I always have extra clothes.
Speaker 4:No, I already do extra clothes.
Speaker 1:Bathrooms be no cool, I'm stripping him down. Yeah, wiping him down. I know what shit smells like you know. It doesn't like whether I'm cleaning a little cool little shit or like the whole back, like I'm cleaning it.
Speaker 3:Well, jackie is good with vomit. I'm surprised she didn't say that because, no, we had an incident at my house.
Speaker 4:I had a couple of drinks.
Speaker 3:That's why, where I got completely Shit Destroyed but I was home, you know. So tequila jazz came out, hey, and Tequila jazz is wild. Tequila jazz was had like three wardrobe changes that day. So these girls, my lovely friends, you know, take me to the bathroom, and some stuff happened in there.
Speaker 4:Listen. Yes, stephanie Courtney and Courtney Courtney wasn't in there yet. Oh, she was outside, I think, jamie was there too. It was a wild Jamie. There, too, everybody was there that day. Yeah, I know what the fuck happened.
Speaker 3:So anyway, something happened in the bathroom. My friend Jasenia is puking in the sink. I'm drunk, they threw me in the shower. Jasenia is puking in the sink and Jackie comes and she's scooping out the vomit with her hands From the sink into the toilet. She's like I'm not letting her clean this.
Speaker 1:I'm not letting her clean this.
Speaker 4:Jasenia threw up because I was sick in the bathroom. No, she is something else happened. We're not going to say, if something happened in that bathroom, say it's in that bathroom, but let me tell you it was a female moment.
Speaker 1:I know where we're going.
Speaker 3:I'm going to tell you after. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it was a moment and this is. She puked all the barbecue food in the sink, so it was like clunk chump, clunk that food. And Jackie is just picking it up Como si no like I was listening.
Speaker 4:I had a couple of drinks and I was like, oh, I could think was. Oh, my god, her mother is going to come into this bathroom and see this vomit and this poor lady is going to have to clean this shit. I couldn't let her do that.
Speaker 3:So my friends are picked it up.
Speaker 1:And your friends are the real envy they are.
Speaker 3:They took care of me. I was out of it and just me and everything.
Speaker 4:I love your panties on.
Speaker 3:She put my panties on.
Speaker 4:She's like oh, I like Close your legs.
Speaker 1:All right, you guys, would you rather get up at 5 AM with an energetic kid or stay up till 2 AM with a hyper kid?
Speaker 4:Get up at 5 AM.
Speaker 3:I'd rather stay up. Hey, I'm not a morning person, mm-mm. How about you with the?
Speaker 2:Get up at 5. I'm a five guy.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're a morning person, I'm not.
Speaker 2:I need my sleep early, man. I'm like 9 o'clock, oh bedtime.
Speaker 3:How about you 5 AM? Yeah, you're a morning person.
Speaker 2:No, I can't, because I'm going to stay up late and still wake up early, right.
Speaker 4:And that's my thing, that's my.
Speaker 1:I have to wake up early anyway.
Speaker 4:So if I I rather because MJ does this to me and he will be wide awake 2 o'clock in the morning and I'm like, please, I don't want to beat you up, please.
Speaker 2:Bena Drill.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh listen. And when I was young, my mom, Ella, she used to give me. Yes now. But did your parents ever give you, like the dime, a tap?
Speaker 2:Dime tap the great one.
Speaker 3:You go to sleep.
Speaker 2:No me, that was my that was my Friday drink.
Speaker 1:I know.
Speaker 3:No, that's where they get it from. Yes, that's, you know, the creation of lean.
Speaker 2:So every Friday. Yeah, my mom was like, let me up the great stuff, let's go.
Speaker 3:Oh my God.
Speaker 1:And I used to like it. It was good. It was good.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's been like oh, can I have another spoon?
Speaker 1:That's like she used to be like yeah, not that, oh, my you know Drugged up.
Speaker 4:So I stopped. I stopped giving melatonin to MJ because it's not good, right, it's not good for you. Yeah, I stopped giving it to him and he but the bottle's still there. He goes, mama, I want the nighttime candy. Just give me a get, take two.
Speaker 3:Nighttime candy. You feel like a bad parent, right? I'm a bad parent After. Yeah, oh my God.
Speaker 2:Nighttime candy sounds wild, bro yeah.
Speaker 4:He's like I just want to Yo freaking take after. No, I was giving Romeo melatonin.
Speaker 3:And Jacenia was like you need to stop Because it was like adult melatonin. That's point. But I'm like it's melatonin, what can I do? And she's like you better stop that.
Speaker 2:It's just the heavier dosage. But melatonin period Supplementing melatonin period Again stops down your own production of the hormone melatonin. That's really the danger. It's not as dangerous as at least in my mind as us growing up on DineTap like every fucking Friday.
Speaker 3:And the pink the Moxicillin. I think that's what I'm allergic to right now, because I used to drink it like juice.
Speaker 1:It's bubble gum baby. Yeah, the bubble gum medicine. It's so good.
Speaker 4:He just had RSV, rsv and a freaking ear infection. They gave him the freaking Moxicillin and I was like he had to take it twice a day, in the morning and the night, and he was so excited.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he was like.
Speaker 4:he was like yeah, I want my medicine. He's like I need to take my medicine. I'm convinced he's going to be a drug addict.
Speaker 3:No, I don't wish that on him.
Speaker 4:He's a little bit. He likes the medicine, he likes the nighttime candy, he likes the freaking Amoxicillin.
Speaker 3:No, I know.
Speaker 4:That's the same anymore, though.
Speaker 3:It's my fault. Yeah, now I'm allergic to it. That's a lot of shit. As an adult, I became allergic to it. That's wild.
Speaker 2:She's allergic to everything.
Speaker 1:I am allergic to everything.
Speaker 3:Everything Freaking thing.
Speaker 1:Like what.
Speaker 3:Literally Bubble girl. Literally, I should be in a bubble. I'm allergic to everything.
Speaker 4:A lot of shit. Imagine not being able to eat strawberries.
Speaker 3:Oh no, and you know what's crazy? This was the Podevija, because when I was young, I used to eat everything. I used to eat ski food, I used to love shrimps, all that. Asapale Camarone was my favorite, I didn't know. I'm just like I wonder why I don't know, but it's called oral allergy syndrome what I have. So I'm allergic to anything that comes from the birch pollen. Uh-huh, shelfish nuts.
Speaker 4:Nah, you're a liar.
Speaker 3:I am allergic to nuts. Not all of them, not all of them.
Speaker 2:I am. I am allergic to like All nuts.
Speaker 3:Yes, Dogs, cats, horses, all that shit we're not.
Speaker 1:You guys are Not chocolate nuts, though she's not.
Speaker 4:The chocolate ones especially, is the ones that she's not, those are her favorite.
Speaker 3:Listen.
Speaker 4:Are we done here?
Speaker 3:Yeah, let's wrap it up I think so or not I'm not allergic, ok, that was a good one.
Speaker 2:Damn, that was snappy. I wish I thought of it.
Speaker 4:Yo, you're jealous today. I don't like it.
Speaker 2:Yo, you're really good today.
Speaker 4:No, I'm not, I'm fucking tired.
Speaker 2:That's why yo don't be coming here with energy. Don't be coming here with energy.
Speaker 3:I didn't have coffee today, I only had espresso martini.
Speaker 4:Not to say you didn't have an espresso martini. I did, you did, I brought it earlier Last night I was drinking Casamigos.
Speaker 2:I was tired. It makes us like, yeah, last night I was wired and I found my pen. Oh, you miss Casamigos with the pen, pen Yo. I heard that shit is like Molly A.
Speaker 3:I don't remember anything.